A short post today.

My first exam is tomorrow.

This is all I have to say today.

It feels like spring.

I'm sitting with the sun shining into the living room and the windows open in the apartment here, notes and notecards and highlighters and sticky-notes and pens and pencils strewn everywhere around me, and I don't think I could be much happier. In a little less than an hour, C is going to come back from her second day at her fancy internship in Frankfurt, my parents are coming to visit very, very soon, I've actually found the time to do some serious juggling practicing today, and (what actually prompted me to write this blog entry) - I've been reading my old Stochastics notes.

Now, that might seem like a silly reason to be happy or indeed to write a blog entry, but I've just been realizing some very cool things while sitting here. Basically, at the beginning of the course, my notes where about 80% English, and consisted mostly of little notes in the margins which were my attempts to understand what the professor was saying - though not always just because it was in German. The sidebar notes were mainly due to the fact that there were lots of things that I was mathematically unfamiliar with that were assumed to be common knowledge at the start of the course. That was the main reason for my confusion in Stochastics this semester- the first few weeks, I was so busy learning the background information I needed that I couldn't be learning the stuff they were actually teaching in the course in time with the lessons and homework. At least, it started that way.

I'm sitting here with my cup of tea and just watching the evolution in my notes into almost complete German, with the occasional comment in English on the side (usually something non-Mathy - such as the lyrics to a song that I had stuck in my head, z.B), and I also notice these giant, darkly scribbled question marks and highlighted areas of the notes where I obviously desperately didn't understand the math or steps in question - and it's all so clear to me now. I've learned SO much in this last semester. Unlike most classes in which you simply further your knowledge that has already been growing for a while - for example, you might have already known how to differentiate or integrate, but by the end of another more advanced course, you can differentiate more complicated things, maybe do more tricky integrals than you could before - in these courses, I've learned to do things of which I had absolutely no knowledge before.

Now, in Complex Analysis, this might not be the case - at least, not as much. In that class, we basically did learn how to "do more tricky integrals" and a whole lot more (though by the end of the class, it's gotten to the point that I can't explain what we're doing to a non-math person without seriously sounding like I'm making it all up on the spot... it's a rough time when someone asks you for an example and you have to say "Well, I actually don't know that there are any, but we can prove that they must exist, somewhere"**) - but in Stochastics and Programming? I didn't even know the subject of Stochastics existed before I came here, and computer programming was as foreign to me as riding a unicycle. And it's amazing to be able to see progress like that. I think when we keep taking courses inside our comfort zone, or at least inside our zone of familiarity, it's easy to feel like we're not moving forward.

But now, the main question: will I still feel so inspired and chummy with my courses when I have to take the exams starting in a week and a half? I'll let you know the answer to that when I know it.

**

The other mind-boggling thing is just how LITTLE I know in the realm of mathematics. I've had several eye-opening experiences to do with that in the past year - attending the Nebraska Conference for Undergraduate Women in Mathematics, attending the Carleton College Summer Math Program, and just looking through the different courses offered here -- how can such vast worlds of knowledge exist when so few people know that they do? I'm sure Chemistry has just as many facets and paths and eye-opening processes of which I am totally ignorant, and to think that every subject must, every aspect of learning must - that is truly mind-blowing. In fact, it is so mind-blowing that when I truly think and try to understand just how mind-bogglingly-huge the complexities are, I devolve into a classic teenager and just have to say, quite rightly, DUDE. WOW.

Before and after pictures (from dinner a few days ago):

Remember when I said we were going to have sushi the other night?

Yeah... it was awesome. :D

One more week!

Hey!

This day has been a combination of pretty much even parts: 1 part studying for Complex Analysis and Differential Equations, 1 part chilling, and 1 part dashing around Mainz and helping C buy some snazzy clothes to wear at her internship starting in a week and two days!

Yes, from now on when I write about what I'm doing, there's going to be a lot of just "I studied" because we only have one more week of classes. Then, on March 1st I have my 1st exam, my second on the 12th, and my last one on the 20th. That means after this coming Friday, no more homework. Amen. It also means ACTUALLY studying for the ONE exam in each class that determines my ENTIRE GRADE*.

As you might expect, I'm a bit nervous, but I'm also confident in my studying abilities and now just have to get down to it.

The chilling in today started with waiting until past 7 to get out of bed - something that isn't happening often these days! Then there was a lovely breakfast with C before one of my friends came over to study. She stayed for about three hours and after that, C and I had a small snack and then headed out into town. C has two internships coming up - one in Frankfurt for about two months and one here in Mainz for the next academic semester. This (unfortunately) means that she doesn't have the nice, two-month-long semester "break" that I do (I say "break" because my exams are in the middle of it), but it does mean she'll be getting some work experience and it's something new after five semesters of school!

Going shopping was quite a bit of fun - it turns out, about once every two months, I do enjoy a shopping trip. A few of the people reading this know that about me. :) It may also be that I'm better at going shopping for somebody else. In any case, with the spontaneous stop at an ice cream parlor at the end of the trip, it was a fun way to spend an afternoon.

I'll be getting dinner ready soon and give myself the night off from work, and it'll all start again in the morning. Right now, though, I feel optimistic and pretty ready. I'm going to get visits from both of my parents in the next month or so, soon I won't have classes and can set into a studying routine, and each day the sun is coming out earlier and staying up longer. All seems to be well. :)

*I may as well note here that I actually only need to pass these classes in order for the credit to transfer back to Mills, but I thought "my entire grade" sounded cooler up in that paragraph, so I wrote it like that. :)

Here are somethings I've been doing that are NOT studying.

Number 1.

Watching Dara O'Briain, an Irish comedian, do stand-up. I've seen him appear on the show QI several times and always thought he was quite funny, and then in a weak moment after laboriously copying down some Complex Analysis notes, I looked up the first part of a video of his stand-up routine on youtube, and promptly spent several hours watching him and cracking up. I encourage you to do the same. Here is the link to part 1.

Number 2.

Reading interesting articles about neuroscience that Claudia sends me while she's avoiding her work in Germersheim. Oh, the end of the semester makes fools of us all. This one is really worth a read.

Number 3.

No links to show here, but the third thing I've been doing is reading up on the Republican primary that is going on. Interesting, interesting. Some of the candidates (okay, when I say 'some' I mean 'only one') are actually reasonable people, and some are, quite frankly, crazy. What is happening in this world?

Number 4.

Doing fun things like buying sushi for dinner. I'm about to go eat. Bye!